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The Importance of Parent-Teacher Collaboration in Student Success

Naina Notes

Year: 1983. Date: 8th Aug

I am very upset today. It was a regular day till we had our Hindi period. The teacher is really boring. She was droning through the class about some squirrel. I was not actually paying attention but so were all the others. Some had even started packing their bags as it was the last period.

Just then the bell rang and many students let out a scream of joy! Yaaaaaaaeeeeh!

Girija Miss got super duper angry. She went around slapping all those who came in her way! And suddenly she was in front of me. Even before I realised it — SMACK, her palm was on my face! I was smarting in pain and began crying! I had no clue why she slapped me.

I cried about this to Amma. And what does she say? Girija Miss is your teacher! Whatever she did was for your good. It's ok if a teacher hits you!

I couldn't believe my ears. My mom was actually taking sides with the teacher. My tears haven't stopped!

Year 2000. Sep 25

It was Open House today. I had an angry parent come up to me and yell at me. He was upset I disciplined his son by not letting him go for PT class. Instead, I was with him in the library getting him to complete his homework!

The parent tells me... Madam, my son gets more pocket money than your salary. Your salary is paid thanks to the fees we pay. You will not punish him for anything.

I am amazed how the father believes that the son needs no disciplining and has the right to do anything as he pays fees.

I look back at the father and tell him, This is my classroom and my rules will be followed here. Anyone who deviates from the rules will have to face consequences. There are no two ways about it.

I am sure I will get a call from the principal in a day or two about this!

Looking back, these moments shaped my understanding of the evolving parent teacher relationship, and how much it impacts a child’s school life.

The Types of Parents We Meet

As an educator most of us may be familiar with both the situations.

Over time I have realised there are four types of parents based on the age of the parent and the child:

1 . The preschool parent who is worried and concerned about the child that he or she may just want to attend your class instead of the child.

2. The primary years parent who think that only they know what the child needs. The teacher is supposed to ensure work gets done, lunch boxes are emptied at school and the child has a good time at school.

3. The teenage parent who is now so confused as to why the child who thought he or she is God is now treating them like the Devil and now tells the teacher to let them know what's happening with the child.

4. The senior grade parent who tells the teacher, Please feel free to do what you want with my child! I have given up

What Are the Expectations That Schools Have from Parents?

To ensure a smooth parent teacher relationship, schools hope parents take responsibility in the following areas:

  • The school is a place where the child is a student. It has a discipline that needs to be adhered to and rules that need to be followed. Teach your child to follow the rules.
  • Respect the school officials, principal and teachers as professionals who are trained to do their work. Talk to them with respect and dignity.
  • Be a role model for your child in all areas. Monitor homework and ensure your child keeps up on a daily basis.
  • Make connections of school work to real life.
  • Be the emotional anchor for your child with a focus on discipline. Discipline means that your child be aware that actions come with responsibility. Allowing your child to do everything without regulations is pampering and not favourable in the long run!
  • Build a good connect with the school. Participate in all activities organised by the school. This will ensure you are a part of your child's school life also.

What Are the Expectations of a Parent from a School?

  • A school should be a place where teachers are facilitators of learning for the child.
  • Teachers and schools should provide an environment that keeps students in a motivated space.
  • Schools and teachers should give the child guidance and support to develop life skills like critical thinking and problem-solving.
  • Teachers and schools should work on keeping the school a happy place where the student wants to come back daily.
  • Teachers need to support students emotionally through the learning journey from a place of respect for the pace of learning of each student.
  • Schools need to become places where students develop confidence and learn to navigate a world that even the educator cannot predict!

A Balanced Analogy: Ajay Devgn Style!

Let me take a little detour.

All of us have seen Ajay Devgn do these massive entry scenes in movies riding two different bikes or cars or even tanks! What do you think is most important here? His ability to balance and the velocity of the two vehicles in perfect tandem.

Every student in a school system is in a similar situation. They are Ajay Devgn’s trying to balance with the parent and the teacher going at different speeds!

The expectations from each other are different yet similar as both the groups have the child in focus.

The Final Word

The parents and teachers have to be receptive to feedback from each other to ensure this balance is maintained.